Howard Hallis

"LEE MARVIN"

Look... there's never really a set protocol for these kind of things...

When you first make a connection with someone...

Or at least when you think you do...

You don't want to blow it.

You don't want to overwhelm or scare them off or get emotionally attached too soon.

You want to keep your cool.

Keep your individuality.

Enjoy the time you spend together without the baggage.

You don't want to admit that your heart races every time you see them.

Too soon for that. You don't want to feel like you need to hear their voice every day

Whether it's just for a second or a whole night of conversation. Not after only one week.

Who cares if you saw pure joy in those first moments when it seemed like both of you were the only people in the room?

Forget all that. It was just an illusion. Impulsive feelings sped up by drinks and novelty.

You want to maintain the delicate balance of the courting ritual. Who will crack first?

Who will fall prey to emotions and pick up the phone?

Who will give in to the temptation of the rush?

Detach. Put up that force field. Smoke 'em if you got 'em.

Think about the shortcomings and the imperfections. Well... she didn't like The Beatles.

But goddamn it if she wasn't so fucking beautiful...clever... smart.

The uniqueness was what really closed the deal, wasn't it? No one else like her.

Think of all the other ones out there that don't even come close

And wonder if you should just call them up for a night of loveless passion

Just to keep those thoughts of her from fucking with your head.

You drive yourself crazy wondering if you're gonna fuck things up even more By just being yourself...

Knowing that if you AREN'T yourself things'll fuck up anyway. So why don't you just pick up the phone...

Just say hi. No big deal. No can do. Fuck that. Temperance will see this through.

And if she moves on because the phone never rang on her side It will just be one more reason to have a drink.

So what the hell can you do? Watch a lot of Lee Marvin movies. Go bowling. Go shooting. Eat a hamburger.

Wait a few days. Maybe she'll be the one to call. And if she doesn't... if those 3 days were all there was...

Damn. Well, maybe call her Wednesday. Invite her somewhere. Think of an excuse to maintain your relationship as friends.

It seems so unnatural. You want to jump right in the ocean But life is insisting that you tread ever so lightly over the puddles.

What would Lee Marvin do? He would get out of town Go to war Make some movies Bang some broads

And come back in a limo in 20 years and knock on her front door in the middle of the night And say, "Get dressed. We're getting married."

And that would be that. He wouldn't fuck it up. I gotta be more like Lee Marvin.